I don’t have anything as wise, and definitely not more wise, to add, so I won’t. I also have nothing to complement your essay with.
However, as a chaplain and a survivor, I wanted to rather compliment you with handling a delicate matter with the full spectrum of gentleness and direct scrutiny it requires to address something such as this evil--as much as is within your power when you decide that, although “this is all I can do at this time”, you then willed yourself into the realm of “and since I can, therefore I will. I WILL do this, for them.”
As a survivor, and again, a chaplain who deals with the fallout of men and women, victims and perpetrators, about this nearly daily sometimes, take my word for it that you did your neighbors justice with this piece. I don’t care how much was for them and how much was for you, although I’ve read enough of your work to suspect you have an “acknowledged altruism threshold” and can only allow yourself to be credited with so much. Fine. I can’t change that. But just as you may or may not be prone to underestimate how much your well-written, wisely-managed ability to put responsibility right where it belongs--without taking too much focus off the victim bleeding to death but never able to fully, mercifully, live or die--you also should know that it doesn’t relieve your pain to write this because of a guilty conscience, survivor’s guilt or anything less credible like that. If it relieves your pain, having read every word, as one who lives on this hellish tightrope, it was because you placed your own puzzle piece of justice--that which is within your power to do today--into place (and with some finesse). As someone who is part of this war I never asked for, I would like to honor that.
A solid piece. I usually am not a fan of Fast Women but her essay was powerful and so was yours! I am adopted too and can somewhat relate to the dysfunctional family. I wondered why the Wingers even adopted.
Ironic that you use the name Winger--is it a reference to Officer and a Gentleman? Debra Winger played the part of a woman dealing with her own dysfunctional family.
Her story is legit and crazy interesting. She was a dancer at first, then came down with illnesses, then took up running. Even now, she runs well while battling Crohn's/UC. I think the entire NE Seaboard is part of the running culture, capped by Boston Billy and the Marathon. Not unlike Midwest football culture in Ohio, PA and NY. (IN is basketball, of course).
Your post about the Wingers really hit home. You are also right about Asians. I was adopted in '84, right when Marcos was burning down hotels. Weird time. He wasn't booted out until '86.
I respect your balanced take on Wade. LRC and other sites don't allow for nuance. I don't always agree with what Ali on the Run says and she doesn't check her privilege but she's also had good things to say and I still think she has value. She has had meaningful stuff before, such as when Sandy Hook happened. She's blogged for 12-15 years and still is plugging away. So like a runner she understands the grind.
I never thought you were racist when you said that. It makes sense. So true also about Maddow and Tulsi. I long for the days of moderate Rs and Ds that you couldn't put in a box.
People don't know how to think critically nowadays!
I don’t have anything as wise, and definitely not more wise, to add, so I won’t. I also have nothing to complement your essay with.
However, as a chaplain and a survivor, I wanted to rather compliment you with handling a delicate matter with the full spectrum of gentleness and direct scrutiny it requires to address something such as this evil--as much as is within your power when you decide that, although “this is all I can do at this time”, you then willed yourself into the realm of “and since I can, therefore I will. I WILL do this, for them.”
As a survivor, and again, a chaplain who deals with the fallout of men and women, victims and perpetrators, about this nearly daily sometimes, take my word for it that you did your neighbors justice with this piece. I don’t care how much was for them and how much was for you, although I’ve read enough of your work to suspect you have an “acknowledged altruism threshold” and can only allow yourself to be credited with so much. Fine. I can’t change that. But just as you may or may not be prone to underestimate how much your well-written, wisely-managed ability to put responsibility right where it belongs--without taking too much focus off the victim bleeding to death but never able to fully, mercifully, live or die--you also should know that it doesn’t relieve your pain to write this because of a guilty conscience, survivor’s guilt or anything less credible like that. If it relieves your pain, having read every word, as one who lives on this hellish tightrope, it was because you placed your own puzzle piece of justice--that which is within your power to do today--into place (and with some finesse). As someone who is part of this war I never asked for, I would like to honor that.
Well done.
A solid piece. I usually am not a fan of Fast Women but her essay was powerful and so was yours! I am adopted too and can somewhat relate to the dysfunctional family. I wondered why the Wingers even adopted.
Ironic that you use the name Winger--is it a reference to Officer and a Gentleman? Debra Winger played the part of a woman dealing with her own dysfunctional family.
Her story is legit and crazy interesting. She was a dancer at first, then came down with illnesses, then took up running. Even now, she runs well while battling Crohn's/UC. I think the entire NE Seaboard is part of the running culture, capped by Boston Billy and the Marathon. Not unlike Midwest football culture in Ohio, PA and NY. (IN is basketball, of course).
Your post about the Wingers really hit home. You are also right about Asians. I was adopted in '84, right when Marcos was burning down hotels. Weird time. He wasn't booted out until '86.
I respect your balanced take on Wade. LRC and other sites don't allow for nuance. I don't always agree with what Ali on the Run says and she doesn't check her privilege but she's also had good things to say and I still think she has value. She has had meaningful stuff before, such as when Sandy Hook happened. She's blogged for 12-15 years and still is plugging away. So like a runner she understands the grind.
I never thought you were racist when you said that. It makes sense. So true also about Maddow and Tulsi. I long for the days of moderate Rs and Ds that you couldn't put in a box.
People don't know how to think critically nowadays!